Well then, that's life for ya sometimes, now isn't it?

Wow, what a day…so October here means rain pretty much all of the time. Sometimes it’s nice out for part of the morning, but yeah, rest of the day, night=rain. So this morning leaving my house I realized I had forgotten my umbrella, was too lazy to go back and get it and justified this by telling myself that I had my rain jacket and that the umbrella wasn’t that great anyway and that I wouldn’t be outside for that long anyway…first Autumn Fail. Second Autumn Fail would be catching the bus to go to my volunteer work (I’ve already done this twice before, mind you, I just can’t for the life of me remember where to get off…) then asking the driver to tell me when we were at InBioParque so I could get off…now the other two times this plan worked perfectly. However, this time I felt as though I had been on the bus for an awfully long time, but the driver insisted that all was fine…finally, he pulls up at the bus station in SAN JOSE and I was like, dude, this is San Jose, definitely not where I wanted to go…and he was like there’s an InBioParque in San Jose, 300 meters that way. I was just like uhh….and I was already late to begin with. However, this very nice young man with beautiful eyes and entirely too much gel in his hair came up to me as he had heard my plight and told me that he would bring me to the bus station to catch another bus back in the same direction from which I had come so I could get to InBioParque and then he did and he even talked to the bus driver about where to let me off…and he also told me that my first bus driver really hadn’t known anything and had just made things up…he said it was because he was Nicaraguan (Ticos have the same bitterness and stereotypes towards Nicaraguans as many Americans have towards Mexicans, for many of the same, often insubstantial, reasons). I just don’t understand AT ALL why people here refuse to ever admit they don’t know where something is. They always just want to help and that constantly entails them just making things up off of the top of their heads. Which, my friends, is worse than “not helping”. Much worse.

Anyway, my new bus driver was super nice and super friendly and this woman in the front insisted that I sit next to her, and we talked the whole way there about my experience in Costa Rica and she gave me a brief, much needed but most likely fruitless geography lesson of the area. She was delightful. Then I finally got to the place, drenched, because I had to walk from the bus. And then the guard took a good 15 minutes and approximately 5 phone calls to let me in because the woman I’m technically working for decided not to tell me that she was out sick…

So, after putting back together a broken dead spider (actually literally I did that) and typing some stuff into the computer, I left to catch my bus. I waited at the stop for a good 25 minutes, and after Maria had told me I could take a different type of bus than usual, I did. However, this bus’s route stopped 2 kilometers from the bus stop I had gotten on it at and about 5 km from the university…meaning, I was stuck in a place I didn’t know with a random bus driver. He actually happened to be a sweetheart and helped me flag down a taxi and waited with the bus until the taxi came and then drove right up to the door so I could get in it and then I took the taxi to the UNA (my university). However, leaving the taxi, I heard the sound of something dropping and knew it was my phone. The issue there was that I couldn’t find it anywhere, not in the stream that was the street, not in the cab, not under the cab…even after giving the driver came out and helped me search and called my phone…nowhere. So now a random taxi driver has my number and probably my phone as well…which isn’t very logical…anyway, I really had no idea where my phone was, paid entirely too much for a number of different buses and a taxi, and was dripping wet. And in that state I met up with Molly, Maria, my Costa Rican friend Laura and her incredibly attractive gaggle of single (what?! Single guys exist here?) Tico guy friends. I was a bit of a mess…and now I am wearing two sweatshirts and shivering and wondering how I am going to wake up for yoga tomorrow with nothing to use as an alarm…

But, to make things a bit better…these experiences happen to everybody. My host mother reminded me that material things are superfluous and the important thing is that I’m safe. This experience is really teaching me to be more laid back about things and to realize that worrying and getting upset does nothing…in fact, recounting the experience makes for a pretty good story…thrift store tomorrow!! Really excited! Then a rainy beach weekend this weekend…ahhh…

It's a beautiful life

I definitely have my ups and downs in general with emotions, and sometimes they can get extreme. But as my parents have told me, since I am a very intense person, it means I can be so intensely happy at times- something that some other people will never experience.

I miss home, yes, but I am really starting to love it here seriously again. After finding all of the flaws, I am finding all of the beauty and am hoping that I have enough time left here-only two months! It really helps that this morning I called the AU financial aid office and the Hollings scholarship office and discovered that I can keep my scholarships and my status in the honors program if I drop this Tridimension class that I originally took for fun and an easy A but oh how ironic! It is meant to discipline art students, that I have spent so much money on, that I have spent hours on, that I have been told by my professor that I was doing well in, and that I apparently have a 70 in (I was just told this 1.5 weeks ago...). She seems to think that's okay; unfortunately, that would be very harmful for my GPA for a class I honestly don't need to take for any reason. I feel a little bad about "giving up"on it by dropping it, but honestly it will give me more time to travel, to spend with my family here, to work on my other classes, to enjoy life with my friends. I am just so relieved. Because I just need 30 credits in the year in total-this semester I have 13, and since I don't have a lot of space in my schedule anyway I was going to take the SCUBA certification class next semester as a sixth class (at least 18 credits in total) anyway (I pretty much need to take all five classes towards my major slash minors every semester until I graduate)

Also, I just can't believe how wonderful my host family is. They just always think of me, treat me like another child, are always giving me advice, always have time to spend with me when I'm available and when I'm not they feel so bad for how much work I have. My host mom also just teaches me so much about life whenever we talk. She is such a peaceful, upbeat, loving, generous person, and I admire her so much. She is so open about everything and always has time to talk about things with me. She encourages me in my classes, cooks delicious vegan food for me, always makes sure I'm happy and well, makes excuses for me that I exercise a lot whenever I eat them out of house and home, and welcomes my friends with open arms. Tonight we talked about how connected my two families got to each other when my family came to visit and selflessness in the name of children and unity within a family. We were talking about how hard it is for my parents as us kids are growing up and how it's especially hard because boys don't share as much with their parents as girls. She was saying how parents have to rediscover spending time together as they did when they were novios and how they have to enjoy every moment. She said at first when she fought with her husband she thought she wasn't right for him because they were so different, but she was patient and found the beauty and good in their relationship and has a rule to not go to sleep angry at him. And now my host parents are pretty much the cutest and happiest couple in the world. This came from talking about a movie she wants to see where a man wants to divorce his wife but his father tells him he has to do a list of things before he can. And they're all beautiful, sweet things to rekindle their romance and their spark. Because so many couples who end up divorced had separated at the first sign of conflict and never tried to be patient and remember why they had loved each other so much to begin with. It's such a good life lesson in general. There is a reason for every decision and every situation, so instead of regretting that decision or finding every flaw in your situation you have to find the beauty in it and be willing to work through your negative emotions to find happiness in the situation you're in. And if something isn't right for you, that's okay, at least you see it with a clear head and with a better perspective. It reminded me of my negativity for a while while here.

I'm also working out so many things within myself here-finding a balance with working hard but not killing myself over my grades because, based on my values, they really shouldn't matter to me as much as they do. Also, I'm really really hard on myself and critical of almost every action  and almost every decision I make. I need to chill out more, stay in the moment, and not regret or get frustrated so easily. To see my situation with a clear head and view things through other people's perspectives.

Also, I have a huge test on Monday, and I'm ready to get down to business studying after movie night with Molly and Maria! This class-Geosciences-is a true challenge, but I knew that and wanted that from the start. I now understand why it's important for me, and it's going to help my Spanish academic vocabulary tremendously!

Anddd....I've been talking to Teresita (program director) about my class issues and she spent literally five minutes the other day telling me how wonderful my spanish has gotten, how it's because I practice so much (I do, sadly, speak English well Spanglish to a lot of American friends here but clearly never to my host family nor my Costa Rican friends though) how I am so confident when I speak, how I barely have an accent, how I hardly make mistakes!! Such a confidence booster, although other people think I have a German accent...that's interesting

Also, I finally started volunteer work with InBioParque...I'm in the Education department, but today I just did survey entry into the computer. However, I wasn't even frustrated with going through surveys of hundreds of kids and counting how many felt a certain way about each aspect of the environment and of their education because I completely get how it's important. I get that I'm not here for long and that it's hard to get me, especially since Spanish is not my first language, working on a project directly with kids. And someone has to do it! It really wasn't bad-after all the work I've had lately sitting at a computer for a few hours listening to my I pod and counting up survey results was actually pretty relaxing.

Anyway, I thought I was just going to write a few sentences, guess that never happens with me...

we're counting down from five...five, four...oh, she jumped already....

So I have now come to understand that my extreme angriness and frustration of the past week/few weeks over so many things here is simply a very regular stage of culture shock. I am now thankfully past that stage and once again appreciating the beautiful country I am in, understanding that it clearly has flaws as do all countries and that it’s doing pretty damn well for a developing country. I always get really intense about things when I have extreme emotions, and this time it led me to message everyone I know in Europe, complain about my life, tell them how an experience in Europe is truly what I imagined study abroad to be like, and demand that they give me every last detail about their experience. While still retaining the desire to travel to Europe, I have since returned to my original mindset of believing that being here is great for me-for the language element, the nature element, a greater understanding of the simplicity of life and the issues that this world must face together. And while it is hard to find many of my passions in common with people here, I have so much to learn from them-how to be simply satisfied with life, how to be more easy going, how to be open and friendly and warm, how to be generous. Anyway, this is truly a rollercoaster ride of emotions, but I guess that’s what it’s supposed to be! Lists!

1. I went bungee jumping today. WOWOWOWOWOW SO scary and so much fun!!! It was at a place with the first jump in Central America and for a while the highest. I think it’s still rated among the top ten in the world because of the height and the view-about a 200 foot free fall. It’s also super safe-20 years, 40,000 jumps, and not one accident. That didn’t seem to comfort the parents when I told them haha. But apparently there were famous people jumping with us! I found this out when this group of children came up to the two most beautiful people in the group and asked for their autographs-apparently they’re on this show on channel 6 here where there are teams and they compete in all of these silly contests. And I got creepy pictures of them! Because that’s clearly better than asking to take one with them. Because I think the concept ofbeing famous is dumb anyway
2. My host family is the cutest. Today they had a party at my grandma’s for a cousin that was going back to Germany to study. My host uncle made inappropriate jokes and danced around while the women sang karaoke to super old American songs-from the 50’s and 60’s and 70’s and 80’s which was really entertaining because in the background they had the artists slash music videos and the effects and the videos and the hairstyles were great.
3. I went to a trash pick up organized by the university in Heredia on Friday. Wow, was that ridiculous-it is ABSURD how much trash there was. And the quantity of cigarette butts. Yummmm. But I met this French woman who has been living here for several years and her husband works for the UNA and she cares a lot about the environment and was telling me how hard it is for people to recycle here and how disorganized things are and how hard it is to organize them. Like to recycle they can bring stuff once a month to the central park or they can drive like 20 minutes to drop it off. But many people don’t have cars. Or big enough spaces to store things for a month…
4. After receiving gloves from the trash walk that I should have returned I concluded that I could finally pick up trash on my way to school like I had dreamed of doing…so this morning on my way to meet my friends to catch the bus to go bungee jumping from 6:30 to 7 am I walked through town wearing one glove and picking up trash. Upon arriving at the meeting place with a bag filled with trash my friend was like “dude, we’re going bungee jumping, why did you bring so much?” I was like, “I didn’t, I was just picking up trash…” he looked at me like I had nine heads and a beard. The best part was bringing a bag full of trash I found on the street on the half hour bus ride and then wandering the streets with it until I found a place where they had separate bins for different recyclables. Classic.
5. I’m going to Vertigo, a club in San Jose, tonight to celebrate my friend’s birthday but it is pouring like nobody’s business. How would you feel if I brought my IFSA Butler Study Abroad bag with the giant green frog on it to a club just so I could bring an umbrella?

Nueva Perspectiva Mae

I'm writing to you at a slightly frustrating time but also at (hopefully) a turning point in perspective. I am beginning to realize that, because of the little guidance I received when I was registering, I have chosen some classes that not only do not fit my interests, but that seem to be, as harsh as this may sound, kind of a waste of time. Firstly, my Tridimension class, while in it I am learning patience and perspective, takes up an absurd amount of time every week (7 hours each week in previous weeks and presently around 15) and, once the design is thought up, is truly just monotonous work. It is not what I am interested in, and all of the other students are art students and have much more profound abilities and interest in this than I do. Also, my professor has informed me of my grade as of late, and it is absurdly low, aka a 70, aka WHAT. I really have no idea how, as she has complimented my work in the past and always told me to relax when I've been overwhelmed or haven't understood something. I sent her an e-mail about it on Monday asking for ways to boost my grade and for explanation and have yet to hear back...This was a class that I took FOR FUN and to keep my GPA high and to relax and THIS IS RIDICULOUS. If this goes on it will destroy my gpa and my social life. And no one even warned me. And I am spending so much money on supplies for this class. And I can't drop it because both my scholarships require that I take 15 credits a semester and so does the honors program I believe. POOP.

 Additionally, my Geosciences class has now moved on to mapping the composition of rocks, something in which I find myself completely lost and not very inspired by yet at least I am being challenged mentally. I still enjoy my dance class and love my readings and professor and the topics we cover in Science, Humanism, and the Sustainability of Life-a class that covers a much broader analysis of the interaction of technology, progress, environmentalism, crisis, and humanity. My likes and dislikes of these classes have truly made me realize that my passions lie in environmental education, environmental policy and in grassroots volunteer work and less in the hard science aspect of Environmental Studies. 

One thing I am very satisfied with is my improvement in Spanish-with my host family, classes, friends, and daily life it is truly getting so much better and so fast! I am also growing more independent and bolder when it comes to things because if I can ask people for help in Spanish, why should I ever be afraid to do it in the States in English? 

My individual volunteer experiences are really good for the most part-the problem actually is securing regular volunteer work. I have been trying very hard with the primary reserve and education center nearby, but they seem very disorganized and have been very flaky about responding to my e-mails and have not returned my phone call. But that's just how things go in Latin America sometimes...

I'm still frustrated with the general ignorance of so many people here about environmentalism and about preservation. I of course don't blame the people, but I blame the education system. For a country whose economy relies on EcoTourism one would think the general public would be educated about making environmentally conscious decisions, about recycling, about keeping the country clean, but so many aren't. I guess maybe that just needs time, especially because EcoTourism is still fairly new. I'm also frustrated with the lack of art, culture, architecture and history that one can experience here, especially in suburban Heredia, and in constant, primary focus on physical beauty. I have realized how much I miss having good places for students to congregate, going to concerts, beautiful churches, clean parks, funky coffee shops, etc. and it has made me start looking into studying abroad again in the fall, most likely in Scotland or possibly in Sweden to be able to have that type of  abroad experience as well. But I need to stop thinking ahead and live and appreciate the moment more and appreciate my experience for what it is and not always idealize other things because I will always be disappointed no matter what the experience is because I build things up too much. Like I did with Costa Rica-Dad was right. I guess it's been so much harder lately because I've been stuck in Heredia and not able to really travel for a while due to the amount of homework I have. It brings out the bitterness in me I guess... Also, there's no where to go with my friends during the week except bars-it's not like college as I'm used to it-doing homework together at night, taking study breaks together, etc. I hang out in my house doing homework and on facebook every week night. But dude, look at the experience I'm having, look at how I'm challenging myself, look at how much I'm learning about myself! And I'm learning to stop idealizing everything and that it's okay to miss and want the comforts and culture of home-it's what I'm used to while at the same time finding satisfaction. Also, being around so many people who obsess over clothing, make up, hair, continually working on their physical improvement (exactly what I was like in high school) I'm realizing how little those things really mean to me. Yeah, it's nice to look nice, but I don't need make up or do buy new clothes all the time or to obsess over if things match or how I look because I'm more confident and comfortable if I don't. And there are so many other things to worry about. Although I think maintaining my body in top physical shape will always be really important to me. 

Bribri Talamanca Gira

So this weekend I went on a trip with my favorite class-Science, Humanism, and the Sustainability of Life. I had one friend in the class- Christina, so I wasn’t completely terrified of being totally on my own. We sat together on the bus to Talamanca (Caribbean side, about a 5 hour drive from Heredia). I slept A LOT since we had woken up super early, and a short time after leaving Heredia, the bus broke down. We waited on the side of the road for another one and then continued our journey. We arrived at this large structure with a straw roof under which were a bunch of tables and hanging plantains and women cooking over basically fireplaces (burning wood). It was unbelievably hot and humid, and my professor was so on top of making sure I had vegan food the entire weekend. The thing is, most things were cooked without meat anyway. Here and at home I am accustomed to eating everything on my plate out of politeness to the chef, so as not to waste food, and because I enjoy it. In my opinion, the food was great (rice, beans, yucca, heart of palm salad, meat for them) but according to my classmates it wasn’t. And judging from the fact that no one else cleaned their plate, I take it that it’s not as much a part of the culture as I thought it was to eat everything you’re given. They also eat junk food constantly, snaking on things they bring from home and buy on the road, so no wonder they weren’t that hungry.

 Then we walked as a group to boats to take us to the organic banana/plantain/cacao/lychee plantation run by an indigenous community. They grow things organically for their own consumption and for local trade in a market that gathers every few weeks. We learned how to pound the rice to peel the skin off. We then got back into boats to go to a house that lies right past the border of Costa Rica and Panama. The woman who lives there is indigenous Bribri, and it is a right of indigenous children born there (mother must be Bribri) to have automatic duel citizenship to Costa Rica and Panama. The Bribri culture is one that envelops animism, where each plant and animal is considered sacred, and it is part of their lifestyle to preserve their natural surroundings while using them for the sustenance they need to survive. This fosters extremely sustainable farming practices.

            The issue with the Bribri population is that it is very isolated from the outside world, with little access to education and healthcare, and with widespread poverty. There is a strong volunteer-based movement to promote eco tourism in the area to spread understanding of indigenous communities, to provide free health care, to educate the young people, and to initiate programs of recycling and environmental protection. The complaint of the people here is that, in a country with an economy based on eco tourism, the money from this tends to go back to the government and not to those who need it most. Additionally, eco tourism often displaces people from their land and revolves around adventure focused activities and not a wider understanding of the people living most in congruence with the land. I am strongly considering coming back here (if my mom will join me, that will be amazing!) to volunteer working on organic farming, teaching English to the kids, and working on a recycling/waste reduction initiative after my program ends and before I go home.

            We then went to have dinner and settle into our lodging which was SUPER cool. It consisted of mattresses on the floor, each surrounded by its own mosquito net in a giant building made from the wood from fallen trees. There was electricity and iffy cold running water. It was clean and rustic and funky-just the way I like it. We then had time to socialize at night, and I got the chance to break out of my shell a little bit.

 During the day I had hung out with my friend Christina, and two other people from our group that presented on pesticides in the past for a project-Karla and Rudolfo. Karla is an actress, and Rudolfo is fascinated by English and constantly asks me to explain English words that I don’t even know. I also met Laura, a spunky, super hip girl who is taking intensive English classes and hopes to study abroad in the states.

That night, it was so cool because they put on music and people just started partner dancing and then we all danced in a big circle, and people are just so comfortable with themselves and with each other here. And then, at one point I found myself seated with a bunch of people talking about Latin American politics in Spanish. I learned more about the increasing issues with narcotrafficking in Costa Rica and in other Latin countries and about the widespread corruption that exists within the police force (these issues are clearly worse in places like Guatemala and Mexico).

I also finally began to understand the scholarship issue here that so many students are protesting about. Here, college is extremely inexpensive, especially the public schools. Per credit the cost is very low, and there are need-based, academic-based, and athletic-based scholarships, just like in the states. The issue here is that the school I attend-UNA, receives loans from a private corporation, as do other public schools. Normally, the funding is used to provide scholarships to students. However, under new stipulations of the corporation, this money must now only be used to build infrastructure and beautify the campus. I suppose so that the corporation can more readily be paid back with the more money the school is receiving from students, without giving them scholarships. There is fear of privatization, something that is a huge deal in Chile right now, where the per credit cost of public institutions is increasing so much that it will soon cost the same amount to attend a public school as it does to attend a private one.

            Having this discussion made me realize that there really are many people who are well-informed here. I just have to find them, like my dad said. I still think there is an extreme lack of environmental awareness or consciousness and overall of understanding of what is going on in the world, as there is in a great many places in the states. But I did make some pretty cool, very sweet and friendly new friends.

            We went to the beach the next day, and I realized how social and kind and laid back everyone was because everyone was looking out for each other, when there was no running water at all in the whole “town” of Cahuita to wash the sand off of ourselves before getting back on the bus, people laughed about it instead of complaining, when there was an incident the night before of a hearing impaired girl wandering off with a boy, everyone pitched in to look for her, and no one made a big scandal out of the whole thing. The professor handled everything that happened with calm and concern, and he was laughing and joking with us the whole time. Overall, it was a truly wonderful experience, and now I have new tico friends! If I ever have time to hang out with them with all of the homework that has just been dumped on me…

I think too much, but too bad, you're gonna hear about it

Okay so I was talking with my friend Rachel today and also thinking a lot and trying so hard to figure out what exactly is behind my disappointment with Heredia and with some of my experience in general. Don’t get me wrong here, I am learning SO MUCH about myself, a ton of Spanish, have met some spectacular people, and have had so many fun/amazing/stunningly beautiful experiences. But, I have this general unsettled feeling with everyday life on some days.

            So on my walk to class I started to realize that a great deal of the frustration stems from the fact that we are in Costa Rica, one of the most beautiful and most sustainable places in the world, but that seems to play no role in anyone’s everyday life in Heredia. There is no active outdoorsy culture, no adjustments made to life to promote sustainability. It is slightly more built into their infrastructure, but it isn’t something that people actively do or think about to promote clean living or appreciate the outdoors. For example, buses are extremely popular, people only own one car if that, and people walk many places. But the mentality is similar as to the one you would find in any consumerist culture-decisions are made simply because they are cheaper, not because there is any more of a collective conscience of sustainability or a deeper rooted connection and respect for the environment as I had thought there would be (here I could go into the discussion I had with my brother Dan over whether or not indigenous cultures were more sustainable than we are today or if people are all the same).

            The next thing I didn’t fully realize until I talked to Rachel is that no one seems to be passionate about anything. Now that’s clearly an extreme statement, and I don’t mean that to such an extreme. Yes, there is a much higher general satisfaction with life, but, the issue is that people don’t seem to want to question things, to want to connect with their environment, to want to jump at the chance to involve themselves in intellectual discussions, to have strong opinions about the politics of the world around them. I have yet to find the people with a hunger for knowledge, with a desire to live their lives in congruence with what they believe in. This is a HUGE issue with suburban America as well-I think that’s why I’ve been so bitter about Holmdel.

Here it seems that either people are too busy working and going to school that they don’t have the free time to focus on a passion. And, when they do have the time, it seems that many are content simply watching tv and finding obscure activities to occupy their time. There is not, however, the ridiculous amount of frivolousness I have always gotten overwhelmed by in many instances in the US because people simply can’t afford to be that way. I just want to meet someone here who wants to save a little part of the world, who wants to question things, who wants to fight for something, who has crazy far reaching goals and aspirations. Who doesn’t focus all of their energy on things that we, as human beings shouldn’t care so much about, when we have this world full of wonder that we are so far from understanding, that hold what is essential in life, that make you stand in awe at the world’s power and beauty and that make you realize how insignificant petty concerns and physical differences are. I want to realize that more myself, and I am lucky to have met friends here who understand that and to have my amazing friends from home who have unbelievable passions. The issue now is to find a place that cares. To find a city of consciousness.

            Also, I have a wonderful friend here who is from a rural area about five hours from Heredia (it takes almost the whole day by bus because of the roads) and who is staying with a host family while going to school. Her family is not nearly as hospitable and generous as mine, and she is given three small meals a day and isn’t even allowed to buy her own food and keep it in the house. She has four siblings and her parents living so far away, and there are no phones where she’s from so she can only call her family once a week. Her parents and older brother can hardly come to visit because they barely ever have time off from work, and they have to take the crazy long bus to get here. She is so close with her family and wishes she could talk to them every day. She is wonderful and funny and kindhearted and sweet, but I don’t know how she does it. She’s not really allowed to go out (I’m changing that, at least a little bit) and isn’t allowed to have a boyfriend. Her situation makes me realize how much I should appreciate my constant ability to connect with those I love, my comfort in my home here, my personal freedom. People have things so much harder than me, and I can criticize the world around me, but I need to always remember to appreciate my position in it, my opportunities, and the lifestyle I enjoy.

I said a bocas, a bocas del what? del TORO. wow, i'm deliriously tired

So in order to update things I have failed to put here, I am going to attach part of the e-mail I sent to my beloved professor, RR, detailing some aspects of my experience.

My favorite class is called Science, Humanism, and the Sustainability of Life, and it's great. Our readings are all about industrialization and development and environmental philosophy and connecting those things to the crisis we're facing today. We also do volunteer work with the class, and I was amazed by my experience with that class going into San Jose's very poor district and feeding and vaccinating dogs and bringing food to homeless people. What struck me most profoundly was how well organized the group was (that's often one of my frustrations with community service, that it’s badly organized) and how passionate they truly were about their work. We went to areas where people were living on top of piles of garbage in dirty, broken down houses surrounded by beer cans or in houses made out of garbage bags, and the people leading the volunteer experience talked to the residents there as complete equals, related to them, unabashedly immersed themselves in their surroundings, petted and crooned to their animals, and did not criticize their lifestyles. It was amazing. Also, the nurse doing the vaccinations was beautifully put together, not wearing gloves, and was not afraid to climb on top of aggressive dogs, soothe them and hold them down at the same time while being sure to give them the shots. She was such a kick-ass, inspiring woman.

Being in Costa Rica has made me realize several things. Before I came, I idealized it, thinking it was the most wonderful country on the planet judging from its eco tourism industry and its abolishment of its army. However, clearly no place is ever perfect. I feel that the eco tourism industry has led to a greater extent of Americanization here than in many developing countries, especially with, sadly, the fast food industry and the fact that Walmart has bought out their major supermarket chain. I also feel that in many areas there is a loss of culture. The traditional values of family, community, and relaxation are still intact, but television plays an abnormally large role, even larger than in many American families, and people are obsessed with American clothing and spending time at the mall. Many Costa Ricans don't travel much throughout their own beautiful country. Also, the education system is great in terms of it being so accessible to almost anyone, with it being almost free to everyone and actually free to a large number of students with scholarships. The issue is that, due to the lower opportunity cost of education, there is less of a motivation for many students to put in a lot of effort, and there is a great lack of organization within the university's infrastructure. I feel that school in the states is much, much more intellectually challenging. Additionally, there is a great lack of independence within many young people, since everyone lives at home until they are married. They depend on their parents, and almost everyone consistently has a significant other, regardless of whether or not they are truly compatible, often to maintain a source of comfort. Also, the great majority of people here are extremely religious Catholics, and in some cases it offers a sense of comfort, of understanding, and of community. However, in terms of politics, it poses a big challenge. The current president is against changing the constitution to allow for a separation of church and state, she is against gay marriage, and refuses considering legalizing the morning after pill. There is a large teen/unmarried pregnancy rate, and often this leads to lack of education and family tensions.

I also miss many cultural activities. I feel that the bigger cities are lacking in a music scene, and there are not many things to do at night as young people other than drink, but I guess that’s a problem in most places. It’s so sad how so many places enveloped in such natural beauty (here and many islands and other parts of South and Central America) and historical richness (much of Europe) seem to always come with such an intense drinking culture.

Anyway, enough of Ms. Negative Nancy who always finds the negative parts of everything when her life is actually pretty damn good. This weekend we had a long weekend because it was Costa Rican independence day on Thursday, and I never have classes on Fridays. So seven of us skipped our Wednesday classes if we had any, left Heredia at just after five in the morning, and headed off to Panama. We had to take a bus to San Jose which actually proved a problem because Molly didn’t make it in time to catch our other bus and Mariel’s card got eaten by the ATM. Hence, they had to take a bus about four hours later while we caught the 6 am bus to Sixaola, which is a pretty run down boarder town, then walk over this rickety bridge with boards missing to get into Panama. At migration we were told we were not allowed into the country without proof that we were leaving, even though we were all planning on walking back over the bridge and taking the same two buses home at the end of the weekend. Therefore, they made us buy bus tickets from this ticket booth that charged $4 more (which is significant when your ticket is usually $10) to take a bus from Panama to San Jose. It was a pretty sketchy situation since they wouldn’t let you buy one from Sixaoala in Costa Rica, and the bus only left at 10 am every day and you didn’t buy your ticket for any particular day…hence, it was most likely a deal worked out between migration and the bus company. Once we got through that, I ran into a man leaving Bocas and looking to exchange dollars (used in Panama) for colones (used in Costa Rica). I offered to give him 10,000 colones for $20, which is a great exchange. He did not believe me. He examined my money in the light, started doing his own calculations, asked several people if I was making things up, and overall made me, a sweat-covered, t-shirt wearing, 5 foot 2, American college student, feel like I was a professional counterfeiter who looked for unsuspecting tourists to trade my counterfeit bills with. Eventually he did make the trade, and kept glancing back at me, waiting for me to burst into laughter at how easily he had been cheated. Of course the reality was nothing of the sort. Then, we were told by a tour bus driver that the only way to get to Bocas del Toro (the cluster of Carribean islands we were headed to) was to take his bus, which cost $10 for an hour and a half ride. I basically screamed at the man, since we had just taken a 5.5 hour, more comfortable bus for that price. But he insisted that that was the only way unless I wanted to take three public buses and spend the whole day getting there. Of course once we gave in, went with him, and got to Bocas, we had to pay $5 for a water taxi to the main island.

Our hostel on the main island of Bocas was called Mondu Taitu and was the funkiest little place. It looked like a bright yellow, slightly run down old house from the outside, and on the inside it was filled with the laid back hostel vibe, drawings, and quotes scrawled by guests over the years. We befriended two of the owners, both young American men, one a graduate of Princeton, the other Cornell. And not intimidating in the least. The hostel was $10 a night, and included a non air conditioned bunk and make-your-own pancakes in the morning. They also had a spigot of filtered rain water to drink and full use of their kitchen. We then took a $1 water taxi to another, very small island to look for a beach. After a walk through a dilapidated neighborhood of very poor houses, we discovered there really wasn’t much of a beach. It reminded me of how much, with our mentalities today, we consider vacations and tropical places natural filled with, made out of, resorts and affluence, when, more often than not, these places are often filled with poverty, alcoholism, and bitterness towards tourists. However, on that same island there was a bar/hostel with a trampoline to jump into the water from, swings and balconies for doing the same, and giant circles cut into the deck to form private swimming holes. As you can imagine, I tore that place up, flipping my heart out and taking a million pictures. That night we went out to a quick dinner and headed back to the hostel to hang out for a bit before sleeping. The hostel had a bar, and to give you an idea of how funky it was and how dumb college students are, it had a free shot that consisted of snorting a line of salt, taking a shot of the worst tequila in the world, then letting the bartender squeeze lime into your eye. One of my especially well chest hair endowed friends offered to let me wax his chest if I did it, but I had no desire to. So then he and my other guy friend did it. They were crying, sneezing, and coughing for the next half an hour. And then insisted it had been awesome. We went to bed relatively early and then slept about ten hours. The next morning I made myself a banana with peanut butter and then proceeded to help Maria and her new Israeli friend cook pancakes. Then the Israeli man, who’s English was not exactly fluent, took out a “banana” that he was planning on putting on top. It happened to be a green plantain, which, let me tell you, if eaten raw, will taste bad AND dry out your entire mouth. So I took it from him and made patacones for him. In the meantime we talked about being Jewish and discussed me going on birthright to Israel and us getting married and my mother being happy about that. He then made me take a picture wearing the Jewish star his grandfather had bought for him right before going into the army… needless to say, I was sure not to bring up my on-the-fence political views…

We then left that hostel and headed to Red Frog Island to our next hostel, Bocas Bound. This hostel happened to be spotless, air conditioned, with our own set of bathrooms and breakfast included, for $8 a night. We also had full use of their kitchen, refrigerator, and board games. Anyway, on the way there Maria realized that she had no idea where her camera was (and she has one of those fancy ones) so she and I decided to head back to the first island after dropping our stuff off to look for her camera and buy stuff to cook dinner with. The camera ended up being in an unlocked box in the hostel in a room filled with other people and no one had touched it! Gives me a little more faith in humanity. Then we had a lot of fun scouring the island for veggies and plantains and rice and beans and talking it up with our new friend Ariel who was 24 with two kids, such a flirt, and had given us a good deal for snorkeling the next day. Once we got back to the island and the hostel we headed to the beautiful, virtually deserted beach for a run. When we got back we did some conditioning and had a hilarious experience all trying to do yoga headstands. Then we cooked dinner with this awesome trilingual Italian man who had spent the last year and a half traveling the world. He shared his homemade Indian bread and this awesome spread he made from guava, bananas, and sugar. We cooked patacones with refried beans, salad, stir fried vegetables, rice (which was interesting since we didn’t have any sort of measuring utensils and Chris overcooked it to the point of mush…) and cut up some of the sweetest pineapple ever. We then just sat around talking and Maria and I made peanut butter and banana sandwiches for everyone to bring on the snorkeling trip the next morning. We paid 15 bucks a person to go out snorkeling (we saw some of the sweetest coral and fish ever), to go dolphin watching, and to get taken to the beach. We then showered and headed out to grab dinner on Bocas at a traditional Panamanian place which, for me as a vegetarian, cost under $2. Then we decided to go out and went first to the first hostel we had stayed in and at the bar befriended some Canadians, one of whom took a liking to me and we decided to tell everyone we were long lost track friends from high school. He asked me when we should say we graduated, I asked him when he graduated, apparently 2001…Then we went over to another place where we just broke it down. I danced so unbelievably much and was literally dripping with sweat. I ran into my Israeli friend who this time told me he loved me so much he could eat me,,,which, apparently in Hebrew means he really liked me…well then…We ended up at a different place with more music and swimming and I realized that I could barely will my legs to dance anymore and that’s when we decided to call it a night and take a boat back…we got back at about five am. The highlights of the rest of the trip:

1. while dancing my pants off I happened to lose the key to our safe box, and we had to have maintenance cut it off for us
2. We didn’t wake up until 12 the next day, and checkout was at 11…
3. Two people who shall not be named were woken up in the lobby of the hostel by a woman who apparently was trying to eat breakfast…these same two had no recollection of how they had gotten there or as to why an article of one of their undergarments was sitting on the table in front of where they had been sleeping
4. There was a torrential downpour during which the restaurant we were sitting in flooded, and Chris’s flip flop was floating around the tables. Stepping into the streets involved stepping into a foot and a half of water.
5. I met a super cool British man who was doing volunteer work in Costa Rica
6. the best and worst part of the trip were the water taxis-sitting in them riding through the majestic ocean was the coolest feeling in the world, but we spent between 5 and ten dollars each way for most of them
7. the last hostel we stayed in was super weird. It looked so laid back and cool at first and clean, but Maria found a tampon in her shower, they shut off all of the lights and locked every outside door at 10:30 so that some of our friends had to scale the fence to get back in late at night. This also caused issues when we tried to wake up early, get our deposits back, and leave in the morning. No one was at the desk; when we had the security guard get someone he was a very angry young man. We tried for an hour and a half, got three deposits back, and then the rest of the people just took their locks as compensation for not getting the deposits back…
8. The sketchy bus we had bought the tickets for before allowed for standing room. And the bus ride was around 5 hours. Those poor people who didn’t get up as early as us…although I did stand for a few hours so this one lovely girl had a chance to sit.
9. We left at 7:30 am and didn’t get back until 5 pm and it’s only about 4 hours away without traffic.
10. I’m really tired so this entry really might not make sense at all
11. We met a TON of Israelis. Apparently it’s because, after high school they serve in the army, then after their service they traditionally take a chunk of time to travel before going to university.
12. We also met Australians, a Kiwi, people from throughout the US, a bunch of German people, some Costa Ricans, some Panamanians, a French couple, and probably more.
13. A GIANT grasshopper was perched on Maria’s butt and I have never seen someone that hilarious in my life as Maria was during that experience
14. We played the funny faces game (as you can see by those fb pics) and had some great heart to hearts
15. I’m really starting to get over caring too much about being dirty/a little aeromatic and about constantly paying a lot of attention to what I’m wearing
16. I definitely feel like I’m missing a bunch but I’m WAY tired. Maybe later.